Fidflapcuss is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, merciless donkey.

Fidflapcuss created the planet Earth four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fidflapcuss, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Fidflapcuss, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Fidflapcuss' most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Fidflapcuss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your legs.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Always help sick ducks.

5. Do not commit murder.