Motcatdub Zeddobhug is a god.

She takes the form of a small, conceited jaguar.

Motcatdub Zeddobhug created the world three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Motcatdub Zeddobhug, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Motcatdub Zeddobhug, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Motcatdub Zeddobhug's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Motcatdub Zeddobhug's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Motcatdub Zeddobhug.

2. Do not drink water in gray rooms.

3. Always obey Motcatdub Zeddobhug's priests.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Hide from magenta rats for they are unholy.