Veennulfebyam is a god.

He takes the form of a large, overgenerous dugong.

Veennulfebyam created carbon two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Veennulfebyam, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Veennulfebyam, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Veennulfebyam's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Veennulfebyam's Holy Commandments

1. Erect three iron sculptures of Veennulfebyam on top of important buildings.

2. Retreat if four whales approach from the east.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate moths.

4. Never wear coats.

5. Do not keep six mites in a large pit.