Zagwodvag Loopriglop is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, wise bird.

Zagwodvag Loopriglop created Asia four billion years ago.

If you believe in Zagwodvag Loopriglop, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Zagwodvag Loopriglop, he will turn you into a hamster.

Zagwodvag Loopriglop's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Zagwodvag Loopriglop's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the east.

2. Erect a giant zinc sculpture of Zagwodvag Loopriglop in the centre of the settlement.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Never go into green rooms.