Govxengen is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, strong slug.

Govxengen created viruses three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Govxengen, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Govxengen, he will turn you into a duck.

Govxengen's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Govxengen's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Erect five titanium sculptures of Govxengen on top of important buildings.

3. Do not eat wheat.

4. Never go into fawn rooms.

5. Never feed coconuts to grasshopers while wearing skirts.