Fonmap is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, stupid cow.

Fonmap created the Virgo Supercluster four billion years ago.

If you believe in Fonmap, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Fonmap, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Fonmap's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Fonmap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Do not speak about turnips.

4. Never wear green stockings.

5. Do not drink water in pink rooms.