Gumgadbod Miffligcid is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, effective swallow.

Gumgadbod Miffligcid created the planet Jupiter eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gumgadbod Miffligcid, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Gumgadbod Miffligcid, she will turn you into a worm.

Gumgadbod Miffligcid's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Gumgadbod Miffligcid's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Learn nine new languages a year.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Gumgadbod Miffligcid loves grasshopers, so they must be honoured.

5. Never think about dark matter near great tits while wearing magenta hats and balancing seven aluminium spheres on your hands.