Narltettijig is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, sage duck.

Narltettijig created the Whirlpool Galaxy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Narltettijig, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Narltettijig, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Narltettijig's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Narltettijig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Do not shave your face.

3. Never write about special relativity.

4. Never mention manatees.

5. Worship no other gods but Narltettijig.