Hapsterbog is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, kind guinea pig.

Hapsterbog created the Virgo Supercluster two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hapsterbog, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Hapsterbog, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Hapsterbog's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Hapsterbog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Always look after injured rats.

3. Never write about asteroids.

4. Do not shave your feet.

5. Never think about stars.