Monarnsafflag is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, merciful salamander.

Monarnsafflag created vertebrates six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Monarnsafflag, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Monarnsafflag, it will be mildly annoyed.

Monarnsafflag's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Monarnsafflag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear green clothing.

2. Always help mice.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

5. Do not keep seven great tits in a large pit.
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