Fonyarlgonwik is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, caring warg.

Fonyarlgonwik created the Tadpole Galaxy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fonyarlgonwik, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Fonyarlgonwik, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Fonyarlgonwik's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Fonyarlgonwik's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Always look after injured hamsters.

3. Do not kill geese.

4. Hide from black bats for they are unholy.

5. Never talk about frogs.