Mifvinquim is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, intelligent lobster.

Mifvinquim created the Whirlpool Galaxy four billion years ago.

If you believe in Mifvinquim, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Mifvinquim, he will not care.

Mifvinquim's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Mifvinquim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. You must never eat grapes.

3. Never think about enzymes.

4. Always make sure there are no turtles in a room before entering it.

5. Never talk about quantum field theory near dolphins while wearing indigo rings and balancing nine silver spheres on your chest.