Soggubjonboss is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, loving warg.

Soggubjonboss created vertebrates six billion years ago.

If you believe in Soggubjonboss, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Soggubjonboss, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Soggubjonboss' most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Soggubjonboss' Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near moths while wearing gray scarves.

2. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

3. Hide from brown cats for they are unholy.

4. Always help sick eagles.

5. Do not dye your hair cyan.