Nurlbabten is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, impressive narwhal.

Nurlbabten created water four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nurlbabten, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Nurlbabten, he will cry a lot.

Nurlbabten's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Nurlbabten's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Pray towards the south.

4. Never laugh near geese.

5. Do not drink alcohol.