Vedkinveg is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, uncaring mouse.

Vedkinveg created the solar system two million years ago.

If you believe in Vedkinveg, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Vedkinveg, he will cry a lot.

Vedkinveg's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Vedkinveg's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Vedkinveg.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Never paint your arms red.

4. Never look at stars.

5. Never think about planets.