Lopmadstrag is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, grumpy toad.

Lopmadstrag created dark matter nine million years ago.

If you believe in Lopmadstrag, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Lopmadstrag, she will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Lopmadstrag's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Lopmadstrag's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat carrots.

2. You must pray to Lopmadstrag five times a day.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Do not drink water in gray rooms.

5. Never think about ultrasonics near otters while wearing purple tights and balancing four copper spheres on your arms.