Mifartgem is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, vain cat.

Mifartgem created the cosmos twelve years ago.

If you believe in Mifartgem, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Mifartgem, she will be mildly annoyed.

Mifartgem's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Mifartgem's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Do not take Mifartgem's name in vain.

3. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.

4. Always look after injured rats.

5. Do not eat spinach.