Quillfagpod is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, kind finch.

Quillfagpod created an atom eight million years ago.

If you believe in Quillfagpod, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Quillfagpod, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Quillfagpod's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Quillfagpod's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat peas.

2. Run away from pink tapirs, for they are unholy.

3. Retreat if five sheep approach from the north.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.