Dimpasdoss is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, humorless wyrm.

Dimpasdoss created a top quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dimpasdoss, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Dimpasdoss, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Dimpasdoss' most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Dimpasdoss' Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Erect a giant yellow sculpture of Dimpasdoss in the centre of the settlement.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Do not dye your hair red.

5. Never paint your neck magenta.