Wotjenort is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, witty cobra.

Wotjenort created Africa three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wotjenort, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Wotjenort, she will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Wotjenort's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Wotjenort's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about asteroids.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Always wear pink.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never feed cherries to eagles while wearing violet shorts.