Vagbenvag is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, tranquil cobra.

Vagbenvag created the Sombrero Galaxy two billion years ago.

If you believe in Vagbenvag, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Vagbenvag, he will torture you forever.

Vagbenvag's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Vagbenvag's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Vagbenvag must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Do not keep five great tits in a large pit.

4. Never think about cell theory.

5. Do not take Vagbenvag's name in vain.