Yarpvogsig is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, selfish faun.

Yarpvogsig created the cosmos four billion years ago.

If you believe in Yarpvogsig, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Yarpvogsig, it will ignore you and hope you go away.

Yarpvogsig's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Yarpvogsig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep nine bats in a large pit.

2. Never talk about comets.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Always obey Yarpvogsig's priests.