Farcadcub is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, merciless turtle.

Farcadcub created matter six million years ago.

If you believe in Farcadcub, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Farcadcub, she will laugh at you.

Farcadcub's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Farcadcub's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place in mauve.

3. Do not keep six snails in a large pit.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Feed all hungry manatees.