Cumyakdubing is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, capable armadillo.

Cumyakdubing created a bottom quark two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cumyakdubing, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Cumyakdubing, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Cumyakdubing's most sacred site is Inshas in Egypt.

Cumyakdubing's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Never write about cell theory.

4. Pray towards the south.

5. Retreat if six grasshopers approach from the east.