Binvedfad is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, self-assured crab.

Binvedfad created Europe two million years ago.

If you believe in Binvedfad, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Binvedfad, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Binvedfad's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Binvedfad's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Do not hurt dogs.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Never think about ultrasonics near moths while wearing brown shirts and balancing eight copper spheres on your arms.

5. Do not listen to music.