Higdapyarsid Lakyimvig is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, humorless frog.

Higdapyarsid Lakyimvig created oxygen two billion years ago.

If you believe in Higdapyarsid Lakyimvig, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Higdapyarsid Lakyimvig, he will send you a sign.

Higdapyarsid Lakyimvig's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Higdapyarsid Lakyimvig's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Higdapyarsid Lakyimvig.

2. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Put Higdapyarsid Lakyimvig first in all things.

4. Retreat if five gulls approach from the north.

5. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.