Natcabstan Bab is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, staggering naga.

Natcabstan Bab created viruses five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Natcabstan Bab, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Natcabstan Bab, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Natcabstan Bab's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Natcabstan Bab's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Natcabstan Bab.

2. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Always obey Natcabstan Bab's priests.

4. Never think about special relativity near dolphins while wearing fawn ear rings and balancing three platinum spheres on your hands.

5. Never wear shoes.