Lapvegmut is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, self-assured raccoon.

Lapvegmut created vertebrates twelve years ago.

If you believe in Lapvegmut, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Lapvegmut, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Lapvegmut's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Lapvegmut's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Do not shave your hands.

3. Never paint your arms turquoise.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.