Hitbomhab is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, cheerful finch.

Hitbomhab created the universe six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hitbomhab, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Hitbomhab, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Hitbomhab's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Hitbomhab's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Always help hamsters in need.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Do not bounce in public.