Lidcadrut is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, generous owl.

Lidcadrut created the planet Mars eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lidcadrut, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Lidcadrut, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Lidcadrut's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Lidcadrut's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Erect six gold sculptures of Lidcadrut on top of important buildings.

3. Retreat if seven grasshopers approach from the south.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate cats.