Lanfodmon is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, passionate porpoise.

Lanfodmon created a charm quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Lanfodmon, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Lanfodmon, he will turn you into a goat.

Lanfodmon's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Lanfodmon's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant zinc sculpture of Lanfodmon in the centre of the settlement.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Do not trade with those who eat corn.

4. Shrews are not to be trusted.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.