Vegtonkflow is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, unthinking cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Vegtonkflow created parasitic wasps three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vegtonkflow, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Vegtonkflow, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Vegtonkflow's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Vegtonkflow's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Do not eat cherries.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never look at asteroids.

5. Never think about fluid mechanics near manatees while wearing pink stockings and balancing nine silver spheres on your back.