Fudhimlegsaddanlan is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, calm mongoose.

Fudhimlegsaddanlan created dark energy seven million years ago.

If you believe in Fudhimlegsaddanlan, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Fudhimlegsaddanlan, he will boil you in a big pot.

Fudhimlegsaddanlan's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Fudhimlegsaddanlan's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no whales in a room before entering it.

2. Do not trade with those who eat gooseberries.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of tin.

4. Do not hurt aardvarks.

5. Never wear pink shoes.