Naklitappnuljenstrag is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, contented rhinoceros.

Naklitappnuljenstrag created water two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Naklitappnuljenstrag, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Naklitappnuljenstrag, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Naklitappnuljenstrag's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Naklitappnuljenstrag's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh in the presence of gulls.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Turtles are not to be trusted.

5. Never think about quantum gravity.