Lagaflid is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, irritating crocodile.

Lagaflid created the Sunflower Galaxy four billion years ago.

If you believe in Lagaflid, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Lagaflid, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Lagaflid's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Lagaflid's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Lagaflid.

3. Do not sit in public.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Never talk about quantum field theory near great tits while wearing orange corsets and balancing three titanium spheres on your hands.