Besslidjat is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, charitable coyote.

Besslidjat created Mount Everest three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Besslidjat, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Besslidjat, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Besslidjat's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Besslidjat's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh in the presence of grasshopers.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Retreat if four cats approach from the east.

4. Never hurt birds.

5. Never feed lots of tomatoes to capybaras while wearing indigo shorts.