Gudwabsin is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, resourceful wolf.

Gudwabsin created viruses seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gudwabsin, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Gudwabsin, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Gudwabsin's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Gudwabsin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Never go into yellow rooms.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Erect a giant aluminium sculpture of Gudwabsin in the centre of the settlement.