Mapyarlgovgatsitdudtam is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, boastful cat.

Mapyarlgovgatsitdudtam created time and space five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mapyarlgovgatsitdudtam, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Mapyarlgovgatsitdudtam, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Mapyarlgovgatsitdudtam's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Mapyarlgovgatsitdudtam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Never leap in holy places.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Tapirs are not to be trusted.

5. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Mapyarlgovgatsitdudtam on top of all buildings.