Sidvongep is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, happy warg.

Sidvongep created a top quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sidvongep, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Sidvongep, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Sidvongep's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Sidvongep's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Do not wear brown clothing.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.