Teendapspag is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, loving pigeon.

Teendapspag created dark energy seven million years ago.

If you believe in Teendapspag, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Teendapspag, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Teendapspag's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Teendapspag's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if four doves approach from the north.

2. Always wear green.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Teendapspag.

4. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Teendapspag on top of all buildings.

5. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.