Cetyattgupgess is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, all-knowing wolf.

Cetyattgupgess created tapeworms seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cetyattgupgess, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Cetyattgupgess, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Cetyattgupgess' most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Cetyattgupgess' Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Run away if nine porpoises approach from the west.

3. Never sing near ducks.

4. Worship no other gods but Cetyattgupgess.

5. Never talk about special relativity near doves while wearing black scarves and balancing six silver spheres on your feet.