Sterqueeg is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, slow scorpion.

Sterqueeg created the universe three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sterqueeg, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Sterqueeg, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Sterqueeg's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Sterqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Never eat beans.

3. Never feed lots of parsnips to geese while wearing violet rings.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Always help grasshopers.