Cutkemnull is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, temperamental squid.

Cutkemnull created time and space nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Cutkemnull, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Cutkemnull, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Cutkemnull's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Cutkemnull's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Always make sure there are no dogs in a building before entering it.

3. Never mention monkeys.

4. Never think about nucleic acids.

5. Never talk about ribonucleic acid.