Lopguplib is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, witless warg.

Lopguplib created the Small Magellanic Cloud two billion years ago.

If you believe in Lopguplib, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Lopguplib, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Lopguplib's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Lopguplib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in white rooms.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Never talk about chromosomes.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.