Jadstigjad is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, contented swan.

Jadstigjad created the Large Magellanic Cloud seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Jadstigjad, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Jadstigjad, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Jadstigjad's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Jadstigjad's Holy Commandments

1. Jadstigjad loves ants, so they must be honoured.

2. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near seals while wearing brown boots and balancing three aluminium spheres on your face.

3. Always look after injured sharks.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.