Jarncibtap Fadlopwot is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, happy crocodile.

Jarncibtap Fadlopwot created light eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jarncibtap Fadlopwot, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Jarncibtap Fadlopwot, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Jarncibtap Fadlopwot's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Jarncibtap Fadlopwot's Holy Commandments

1. Jarncibtap Fadlopwot must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Do not kill snails.

3. Do not take Jarncibtap Fadlopwot's name in vain.

4. Never think ill of sick foxes.

5. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.