Sanlarnster is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, duplicitous monkey.

Sanlarnster created the planet Venus two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sanlarnster, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Sanlarnster, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Sanlarnster's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Sanlarnster's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Never talk about thermodynamics near ducks while wearing green shirts and balancing five carbon spheres on your legs.

5. Never talk about quantum gravity.