Hitorttarg is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, emotional whale.

Hitorttarg created an atom five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hitorttarg, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Hitorttarg, he will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Hitorttarg's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Hitorttarg's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about ultrasonics near squirrels while wearing indigo ear rings and balancing six carbon spheres on your legs.

2. Run away from yellow goats, for they are unholy.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never paint your hands orange.