Pakvigman is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, awe-inspiring grasshopper.

Pakvigman created the Whirlpool Galaxy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pakvigman, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Pakvigman, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Pakvigman's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Pakvigman's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick rats.

2. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

3. Never wear coats.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.

5. Do not wear blue clothing.