Nurtcidquill is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, calm fish.

Nurtcidquill created matter eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nurtcidquill, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Nurtcidquill, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Nurtcidquill's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Nurtcidquill's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt grasshopers.

2. Nurtcidquill must be the most important thing in your life.

3. You must never eat melons.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Do not listen to music.